


Mistakes

by RiverSong1112



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-07
Updated: 2013-01-07
Packaged: 2017-11-24 00:53:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 378
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/628428
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RiverSong1112/pseuds/RiverSong1112
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>I didn’t see it at first, when he made the deal with me. I never meant to betray anyone, but I know now that once our lips met and I sealed the deal, I couldn’t turn back</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mistakes

**Author's Note:**

> Originally written 08/03/12
> 
> http://fanficsbyraine.tumblr.com/post/28676764214/mistakes

Have you ever felt something but not known you felt it until someone else acts on it or points it out? It was like that. I honestly liked Dean, don’t get me wrong, and when this started he was still with Lisa. And I didn’t know a deal and a kiss could over turn my entire world. It was an innocent gesture. But during that first year, while Dean was still with Lisa, the deal was altered many times and a kiss had to seal it every time. It even got to the point where I would make needless changes just for the kiss. I think Crowley realized this too.

I never expected Dean to come back, though. Never expected that Sam would need to involve him and drag him back. That moment had me running to Crowley to add to the deal. The Winchesters had to stay safe though all of this. They protected me, so I must protect them.

“And what do I get out of that, kitten?” Crowley asks after hearing my plight. He takes off his gloves and turned to face me.

“What do you want for it?” I would give up almost anything to keep the brothers safe. They were my only friends.

“I’ll tell you what, I’ll add “and regular shagging” for me and you’ve got a deal, if you can trick them into working for me.”

And I did it. And we had sex for the first time to seal that amendment, and it was the best night of my life. And Dean was still with Lisa so this was fine. He could get sex this way and everyone would be happy. But when Dean and Lisa broke up, Dean prayed me down for sex, like old times, and I couldn’t say no without Dean asking unwanted questions and me saying things he didn’t need to know.

Really, I never wanted to hurt or betray anyone. But things went too far and I played both sides as well as I could for as long as I could. The pain in Dean’s eyes when he found out was unbearable. And then, I had to fuck up Crowley’s ritual because that’s what Dean and Sam would have done.

I ended up alone, anyway.


End file.
